Recently, my parenting focus has been on discovering peaceful responses to juvenile spats. Whether your children have only seen a safe home environment or are recovering from parenting trauma, finding ways to teach self-regulation and emotional intelligence can be very challenging. Here are a few suggestions that have helped me. 1. When my children are fighting, we … [Read more...] about Peaceful Parenting
Support Networks
Family Resource Centers on Military Bases
In a military family, raising children, especially when relocating, can be challenging. It can disrupt the children's academics, social networks, health care, and sports activities. Today's military spouses who tend to be under 35 and largely female are often in an unfamiliar location without a support network. Being informed and utilizing the available resources, whether it … [Read more...] about Family Resource Centers on Military Bases
Family Law Basics
Divorce, child custody, and child support issues can be difficult and confusing. Family law issues are covered by state law. Here are some basics about these types of cases. Editor’s Note: This is general information and not legal advice. Please consult with a lawyer licensed in your state for legal advice. By Susan Schoppa, J.D. … [Read more...] about Family Law Basics
11 Ways to Communicate with Children Online
One of the most challenging things about living at a distance and social distancing in general right now is communicating with children via a screen. Small children just don’t pay attention to chatting with grandparents through a screen. They don’t understand not being able to touch them, and they bore easily. Here are 10 tips on how to communicate with children … [Read more...] about 11 Ways to Communicate with Children Online
How to Help a Friend with COVID-19
It is difficult not being able to see friends in person, and it can be disturbing when you learn that someone you know is sick with COVID. You want to help, but you also don’t want to get sick. Here are 7 ways you can help a friend with COVID, including some ideas on what you can send in a care package if you have a friend who is sick who lives a long distance away. Pick up … [Read more...] about How to Help a Friend with COVID-19
How to Find Help for Veterans
We understand that many people need someone to care for them at some point. Perhaps you have a spouse, parent, grandparents, or other relative who is an veteran, and s/he requires some assistance. Or maybe that vet is you. You want to care for you and yours as best as you can, but perhaps you need some help. What resources can you rely on if you find yourself … [Read more...] about How to Find Help for Veterans
Preparing to Say Goodbye to a Baby
While you are pregnant: Keep a journal.Save the positive pregnancy test.Ask for ultrasound pictures.Videotape the ultrasound.Record the baby’s heartbeat.Take pictures of your belly, or even make an imprint.Knit, sew, or buy a hat for your baby.And if you learn you are losing your baby while pregnant, knit, sew, or buy two blankets for your baby: one you’ll use while your … [Read more...] about Preparing to Say Goodbye to a Baby
Teaching About Race — from the Inside Out
In the midst of the Black Lives Matter uprising, the disparity between my light skin tone and my son’s dark skin tone has never been more pronounced. I first noticed our difference when in the year of his birth, Trayvon Martin, an unarmed youth, was shot and killed. As I was reading the horrific news, my older boy walked in wearing a hoodie, as he often does, and the hood was … [Read more...] about Teaching About Race — from the Inside Out
Practical Tips When Caring for Our Elders
If you are a caretaker of an elderly person, help is here. Learn where help is available:The Administration on Aging offers many services such as fall prevention, aging and disability programs, brain, oral, and behavioral health programs, elder abuse prevention, legal assistance, and retirement planning, and has chapters in most of the U.S. Find AoA services in your area.The … [Read more...] about Practical Tips When Caring for Our Elders
American Indian Women and Men: Know Where to Seek Help in a Crisis
Shelter-in-place measurements to prevent the spread of COVID-19 can also increase the likelihood of women and men being trapped in domestic and/or sexual abuse situations at home. Despite the threat of the virus itself, stay-at-home orders and the suspension of community rituals and events have been attributed to a rise in domestic and sexual abuse in both rural Native … [Read more...] about American Indian Women and Men: Know Where to Seek Help in a Crisis
Your Guide to Guardianship and Kinship Care
What’s the difference between guardianship and kinship care? Guardianship is a legal process that allows a designated person to have responsibility for a child and the authority to make decisions on her or his behalf. Kinship is when the guardian is a relative or, in some cases, a close family friend. The guardian in both of these options is responsible for the well-being … [Read more...] about Your Guide to Guardianship and Kinship Care
How to Network and Build Your Personal Support System
Workers across industries know this proverb to be true: “It’s not what you know, it’s whom you know.” The key to building a great career is networking, or growing the circle of people in your field of work who can help you find a job. Although your skills and qualifications do matter, here is why networking may matter even more: Recommendations. Words on paper … [Read more...] about How to Network and Build Your Personal Support System
Dealing with Dejection During COVID-19
During a time of isolation, feelings of rejection heighten. If you’ve dealt with a messy breakup, been abandoned, or experienced major death loss, this covid chaos might bring you full circle to Stage 1 of grief, which you thought had passed. Add to that children in your face, fingers under the bathroom door, and tweenage attitudes about school assignments, and these feelings … [Read more...] about Dealing with Dejection During COVID-19
Doing Her Part: A Seamstress Joins the COVID-19 Effort
The coronavirus pandemic hit home for Giana Mylan. Literally. That’s because Mylan, 28, lives in Queens, New York, the county with the most confirmed cases of COVID-19 in the United States. One of the most serious logistical crises facing those on the front lines of the effort to slow, stop, and defeat the virus is the shortage of personal protective equipment, or PPE for … [Read more...] about Doing Her Part: A Seamstress Joins the COVID-19 Effort
What Do You Do When You Suspect Child Abuse?
The Mayo Clinic defines abuse as “any intentional harm or mistreatment to a child under 18 years old.” Abuse takes many forms: emotional, physical, sexual, medical and neglect. All community members are responsible for protecting the most defenseless among them. Children may not speak up and they certainly cannot protect themselves, but you can be their voice and you can … [Read more...] about What Do You Do When You Suspect Child Abuse?
8 Ways to Keep in Touch with Elderly Loved Ones When You Can’t See Them in Person
The elderly, especially those with pre-existing conditions (heart disease, diabetes, hypertension, respiratory issues including asthma and COPD, etc.) are at highest risk of dying from COVID-19. Right now, many are isolated and need contact from their family and friends. Here are ideas to keep up their spirits while you are separated. You benefit too from communicating … [Read more...] about 8 Ways to Keep in Touch with Elderly Loved Ones When You Can’t See Them in Person
14 Tips to Take Care of Your Own Mental Health
Leaving the house and being social is often suggested as a way to stay mentally healthy, but sometimes, that is not possible. What is someone with depression or anxiety to do when she has to take social distancing measures? Here are 14 tips to help you get through these challenging times: Go outside. If the weather is nice, take a walk around the block or to a park. Just … [Read more...] about 14 Tips to Take Care of Your Own Mental Health
7 Tips on How to Talk to Your Child About Scary News
You can’t watch the news without hearing about scary news. If we can’t get away from the news, neither can our kids. It can be worrisome to talk to your kids about things like this when you are anxious yourself and don’t have all the answers. Here is the best advice we could find from the CDC and experts: Take care of yourself. Do what you need to do to be calm for your … [Read more...] about 7 Tips on How to Talk to Your Child About Scary News
16 Ideas for Stay-at-Home Dates
Watch a movie with a new snack. Pick up some weird flavor of popcorn or some other new snack and pop in a movie.Candlelight dinner for two under your own roof. Buy something special at the grocery store and put the kids to bed early. Cook it together for some extra fun.Have a game night! Break out your favorite board game or just a deck of cards and look up the instructions for … [Read more...] about 16 Ideas for Stay-at-Home Dates
50 Cheap Date Night Ideas
Dates don’t have to be expensive. No rule says it has to be at a fancy restaurant or pricey theater. Any quality time spent with the one you love can be a date. Here are 50 ideas for dates that won’t break the bank: Hang out someplace that is cheap or free, like the library or a high school sports game.Watch a movie with a new snack. Pick up some weird flavor of popcorn or … [Read more...] about 50 Cheap Date Night Ideas
7 Tips to Ease Painful Goodbyes
It’s always easier to say goodbye when you know your child is well cared for and you are choosing the separation for one reason or another. When Mom is going to do something fun or at least distracting, the separation seems less sharp. It’s much harder when you are forced into that separation. The divorce culture certainly understands well how traumatic court-mandated … [Read more...] about 7 Tips to Ease Painful Goodbyes
10 Tips for Dealing with Typical Separation Anxiety
In all situations, there comes a time when separation is inevitable. Whether a death across the country or a business trip in another state mandates it, there will come a time when you have to pull the tiny fingers off of your own and step away from the leg hug so familiar to you. Some mothers have expressed to me the trauma experienced from the first morning of day care … [Read more...] about 10 Tips for Dealing with Typical Separation Anxiety
What to Expect When Raising a Multiracial Child
As a white mother raising a multiracial child, I can assure you, the racial experiences for my son and me are not the same—that is the first lesson I learned. We are living in ever-changing times right now that have challenged us as adults and especially as parents. A spotlight has been cast on racism that is bringing to light a much-needed conversation. In the school of … [Read more...] about What to Expect When Raising a Multiracial Child
Have You Heard About Financial Abuse?
The majority of people who are abused by their significant others are also victims of financial abuse. Three signs of financial abuse are: Limiting access to money and controlling spending. Even purchasing groceries is impossible. The abuser will limit the abused partner’s access to money so she cannot afford to live on her own. Interfering with work. The abuser … [Read more...] about Have You Heard About Financial Abuse?
Why Friendship Matters (and How That Changes As a Parent!)
Maybe meeting your friends at the movies on a Friday night helps you relax after a tough week at work. Perhaps calling a friend after receiving difficult news provides you with the support you need to complete a semester at school. Or maybe hearing a friend’s excitement about the fact that you got into the graduate program of your choice makes you feel loved and encouraged as … [Read more...] about Why Friendship Matters (and How That Changes As a Parent!)
Why Friendship Matters (and How That Changes While Pregnant!)
According to a study from UCLA, women may not respond to stress with the popularly referred to “fight-or-flight” mechanism, but rather, with a “tend-and-befriend” mechanism. In other words, women typically rely on friend networks to cope with difficult situations and times of change. Finding out that you’re pregnant means that you’re about to go through a lot of changes, and … [Read more...] about Why Friendship Matters (and How That Changes While Pregnant!)
When You Need to Call for Help: Domestic Violence
Internet usage can possibly be monitored. If you need to exit this page quickly, close the tab or click "Women Deserve Better" in the upper left corner. To delete this webpage from your browser's memory, go to your browser's settings. If you need immediate help, call The Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or 911. Domestic violence affects every social class, race, and ethnicity … [Read more...] about When You Need to Call for Help: Domestic Violence
Find Your Village
You have probably heard the phrase, “It takes a village.” Usually, this phrase refers to child-rearing and birth, and while it may not take a literal village to successfully give birth and raise children, it does take a metaphorical one. That is why we encourage you to find your village. Women have very powerful instincts. When a baby is conceived, a mother is born. This … [Read more...] about Find Your Village
How to Work with Grandparents
Children develop self-esteem and feel secure about the world through the love they receive by the adults around them. Grandparents can be wonderful assets. Not only can they be occasional caretakers, but they might also offer knowledge and comfort to you and to your baby. No matter what kind of relationship you may have with your parents, children will change the … [Read more...] about How to Work with Grandparents
Do You Know the Signs of Intimate Partner Violence?
Internet usage can possibly be monitored. If you need to exit this page quickly, close the tab or click "Women Deserve Better" in the upper left corner. To delete this webpage from your browser's memory, go to your browser's settings. If you need immediate help, call The Hotline 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or 911. If you are experiencing physical, emotional, financial, and … [Read more...] about Do You Know the Signs of Intimate Partner Violence?
8 Tools for Coping with Miscarriage
Emotions You May Feel: It’s normal to feel an array of emotions after a pregnancy loss. These emotions can range from but are not limited to: sadness, numbness, shock, depression, anger, disbelief, a sense of failure, and vulnerability. The first thing to remember during this time is that it’s OK to feel these emotions. Second, the loss of pregnancy isn’t your fault; … [Read more...] about 8 Tools for Coping with Miscarriage
What to Do If You Have Been Sexually Assaulted
If you have been sexually assaulted, or suspect that you have been drugged without your consent and suspect that you have been assaulted, you need to know that help is available. What has happened to you is a crime. It is NOT your fault. You are NOT to blame. No matter what you were wearing or doing, no one has a right to your body without your consent. Whatever you feel is … [Read more...] about What to Do If You Have Been Sexually Assaulted
Whatever You Need Is OK When Dealing with Pregnancy Loss
One in three women will experience pregnancy loss. This is a staggering number. Sadly, most of these women will experience a miscarriage, late miscarriage (sometimes called a demise by doctors), or stillbirth without any support. They will be alone, emotionally and physically. But it doesn’t have to be this way. If this is your experience, we are sorry for your … [Read more...] about Whatever You Need Is OK When Dealing with Pregnancy Loss
How to Get Help If You Are Being Trafficked
If someone is forcing you, coercing you, or manipulating you to perform sex acts in exchange for money, food, a place to stay, or because you “owe them,” please know this is illegal and is a crime! It could be a pimp/madam (trafficker) or anyone. If you have run away or are homeless, please know you do not have to do engage in prostitution. You CAN get help! Your safety is … [Read more...] about How to Get Help If You Are Being Trafficked