Unexpected pregnancies can bring about a lot of emotions. Besides navigating all your own feelings, we often have to deal with the expectations of others, which can place a lot of pressure on you.
Even though there are all kinds of families in our society, there is still a common stereotype that all children must have a biological mother and biological father in their lives to thrive. While this may be ideal, it is missing one obvious point, that children need healthy and safe parents and guardians in their lives to thrive.
There are some situations where this is not possible. Perhaps you were the victim of rape, trafficking, or domestic violence. Maybe you are dealing with a relationship of abuse, threats, or addictions. Maybe you do not know who the father is. In each of these cases, know that making the best choice for your child is the one that is the safest choice. You are no less of a parent if you are a single mother, a birthmother, or a co-parent with a guardian. Do not let societal expectations dictate what is best for you and your child.
Your child can grow and thrive even if the biological father is not involved. There will be many support people who will come into you and your child’s life, and that’s what matters. There is no one “perfect” family, they come in all styles, and many are made of up of those we choose. Take care of you, and it will benefit your child, too!
By Joyce McCauley-Benner